7 Types of People In Your Office Bracket Pool

Ah, March Madness. The time of year where millions of Americans decide to start acting like they have kept up with college basketball. Whether you are a sports fan or not, you're aware of the excitement that is the NCAA Tournament. The workplace is a special place during the Big Dance. Every thursday and friday are filled with avoiding the work you should be doing, and live-streaming as much basketball as you can handle until your boss actually finds out what you're doing (or 5 o'clock.. whichever comes first). Here, we break down the 7 types of people you may experience in your company-wide Bracket Pool.

1. The Commissioner

This is the same guy who creates the Fantasy Football league, the Super Bowl Grid competition and his Yahoo! fantasy sports profile is absolutely ridiculous. Nobody eats, sleeps and breathes fantasy competitions like this guy. More times than not, the Commissioner is the lone soul with an over the top team name that combines college basketball with something thats usually NSFW. He's been sending company wide emails for a month now, constantly reminding everyone of the somewhat ridiculous cost to get your name in the hat. However, nobody else wants to have that responsibility, so you gotta respect him.

2. The Trash Talker

Like the commissioner, the trash talker is very engaged in every office pool that comes his way. However, this guy spends way too much time researching his picks before submitting them, and would argue that he knows everything about every team in the tournament. The thing that sets this individual apart is that he actually uses the online message board to let you know how bad your bracket is. He knows everything about the competition's picks, and doesn't cease to remind you when he picked Yale over Baylor in the first round. Who actually uses that thing? To make it worse, if nobody responds (which they dont...ever), he'll switch over and take his "trash talking" to the company Instant Messaging platform. If there's one person to claim the title of "Most Hated Person In Your Company," the Trash Talker is the defending champion.

3. The "My Other Bracket" Guy

We all know who this guy is. He never wins the office pool (ever), but you can absolutely count on him to have "called it" in his other bracket. This mysterious "Other Bracket" is similar to the land mass that people call "North Dakota". People talk about it, and there's supposedly a college there... but you don't know if it's actually a real thing. 16 seed beats a 1 seed for the first time in history? "Heck yeah! I picked that on my other bracket!" Luckily, he doesn't use the message board to let you know, so it's best just to avoid him at all costs.

4. The Guy Who Picks the Top Seed Every Time

We would hate this guy if it ever actually happened. But, because it NEVER works, he's just irrelevant. You always enjoy the person who fills out his bracket this way, because he's one less person that you have to compete with to win the pool. If you think this is an acceptable strategy, you should probably join all 10 people who fill out brackets for the Women's NCAA tournament. Even then, you're still not in a great spot.

ICYMI: The UConn Women's basketball team were 57 POINT FAVORITES to win their first round game in the NCAA Womens' tournament. I don't keep up with women's basketball, but Good Lord!

5. The Girl

Yes, her. That female in the office who enters the bracket pool. Don't confuse this individual with the women who are actually knowledgeable about sports and can hold GREAT conversations about it! This is not that girl. Often times, this girl surprises people with how her bracket turns out. Even though her picks are based on:

A) The school she went to college to OR the state she is from

B) If she had fun the last time she visited that city

C) How cute the mascot is

In the beginning, this bracket is nothing but a joke... until she calls that 15 seed knocking off your overall champion in the first round, pissing the entire company off.

6. The "I never make a bracket" guy

These type of people fall into the same category as 'Paleo' people and those who sell ItWorks! on Facebook. They have no reason to tell you, but they make sure to do so at least 30 times a week. "Nah, man. I don't ever fill out brackets. It's more fun that way." Shut up. What's more fun than gambling and potentially winning a large pot of money? You're right. There are things more fun than that, but we'll keep this PG.

7. That guy who doesn't even work here

Who is this guy? Nobody in the office knows, and nobody in the office knows how he got there. You can only assume that the hardcore commisioner invited him, solely to make the pot bigger and increase his Yahoo! Sports ranking.

As for me? I just pay my dues, fill out my bracket, kick a** and take names. Good luck!